Tuesday, July 29, 2008

What's Holding YOU Back?

First published in The Daily Sentinel, Friday, June 20, 2008.

With this post, I finally got all of June's articles online. In a few days, I will get July posted; but , of course, by then it will be August! Will I ever get caught up??



Every year, United Methodists from around the state gather for what’s called Annual Conference. Last week, I joined pastors from across the West Ohio Conference, along with lay representatives from most of the 1145 United Methodist congregations, at Lakeside, Ohio on the shore of Lake Erie. It was my fourth time at Lakeside, and it was also my favorite time, so far.

In gatherings like Annual Conference, the temptation is always present to skip the official meetings in favor of fishing on the lake, cruising to the islands, or simply being lazy on the front porch of the cottage and enjoying the view. Instead, we gather in cavernous Hoover Auditorium (un-air-conditioned) to hear reports from various groups, debate proposed legislation, vote on budgets, and deliberate the minutiae of conference business. Like I said, the temptation is strong to skip…

But one of the highlights of Conference is gathering for worship together. And this year, the worship services were incredible! It was like an old-fashioned camp meeting revival. The music was tremendous, the Scriptures were proclaimed magnificently, and the preaching was powerful and Spirit-filled.

One of the dynamic preachers present was Pastor Rudy Rasmus from Houston, Texas. Pastor Rudy is not your typical United Methodist pastor. The first thing one notices about Pastor Rudy is his beard. It grows straight down from his chin and is braided into three strands. Each strand is decorated with glass beads. They give weight to his beard; so when Rudy talks, his beard dances and jangles.

“I call it my ‘early warning tolerance detection system’,” said Pastor Rudy to the gathering. “I can tell right way whether or not a person is interested in talking to me based on their physical reaction to my beard.”

Pastor Rudy’s beard took some getting used to, but his message was dead-on. He preached from the gospel of John 5:1-15. It’s the story of the paralyzed man who was waiting by the pool of Bethesda near the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem. Lots of sick, injured, and crippled people gathered there in hopes of being the first person in the pool when an angel came and stirred the waters. Jesus approached the man and asked him if he wanted to get well. Here’s how the story concludes:

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.

What a miracle! And most of the time, that’s what we focus on when we read this story. But Pastor Rudy took a different approach. He asked the question: Why didn’t the invalid answer the question Jesus asked? Ii requires a simple yes or no response. Instead, the man gave Jesus excuses for why he had not gotten well.

Pastor Rudy applied the question to us. Why don’t we answer Jesus honestly? Why do we offer excuses? Why do we as a church not demand a truthful response? Pastor Rudy dared to suggest that the truthful answer is that we often do NOT want to get well! We’d rather wallow in the known condition of our lives than accept the dramatic, radical transformation that God offers to us through Jesus Christ!

We are paralyzed by our fears, by our stubbornness of refusing to let go of misplaced values, and by system of church where it’s perceived to be more lucrative to keep the sick in the pews rather than heal them out the doors. Pastor Rudy called such pastors and church leaders “priestly pool pimps” who are more concerned with sustaining their organizational bureaucracies than in participating in God’s work. Their medicine is “preventative” – preventing people from experiencing the totality of grace – and therefore “prohibitive” – prohibiting true healing.

I was profoundly provoked by that message. What have I done to put people fully into the path of grace? What have I done to keep people paralyzed? What’s holding me back from getting the healing that I need for myself?

During the summer, it’s tempting to put faith-forming aside in favor of enjoying the outdoors, cruising the countryside, or simply being lazy on the porch. You may not realize it, but giving into that temptation is paralyzing. What’s holding you back from being a true disciple of Jesus? Are you ready to get up and walk? Then DO IT!! No more excuses. No more priestly pool pimping. Just get up and go with Jesus!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

The Meaning of Fatherhood

I've got some catching up to do with entries here. So, although Father's Day was last month, here's my Father's Day column:


First published in The Daily Sentinel, Friday, June 13, 2008.

Father’s Day is special to me – and not because I am the proud father of three children. It’s special to me because it allows me to honor my own father. I have written before about my mother and her impact on my life, but now it’s Dad’s turn to get a few words of gratitude.

My relationship with my father has been very rocky at times. As a young boy, I feared Dad more than Mom. It might have had something to do with a black leather belt! Yet, that belt was not used very often – and never in an abusive manner.

When my mother died, my dad and I grew very close. In some ways, that first year after Mom became my time to function as substitute-mom for my younger brother and sister. I took over transportation duties, much of the meal preparation, and delegated household chores. At the same time, I also held down a part-time job at the JC Penney in the mall. It was an early introduction to the demands and responsibilities of adulthood, and my dad was there to help me through it.

Then I went away for college. Without realizing it at the time, I went away for good. I no longer took up residence in my dad’s house for more than a few days at a time. I went through many changes when in college, and so did Dad and my siblings. Dad remarried. I was happy for him, but I did not go to the wedding – I had scheduling conflicts with my job near the university.

Towards the end of my collegiate days, I started dating the woman who would become my wife. She came from a different branch of Christianity than the one in which I was raised. Those differences in how she expressed her faith in Jesus and how Dad expressed his faith created even more tension. In short, Dad did not want me to marry her. I very much wanted to marry her. Our relationship suffered over that conflict even more.

During my seminary education, I read some books that discussed the idea of fatherhood and God. From a very strong feminist perspective, the idea of calling God “Father” is problematic. Ruth Duck, a professor of worship at a seminary near Chicago, published “Gender and the Name of God” in 1991. She wrote: “Although ‘Father’ has a place in Christian worship among other metaphors for God, I have come to believe that this metaphor should not be so predominant in Christian worship. ‘Father’ has unfortunate associations for many in North American society, in which patriarchal values condone the abuse of children by their fathers.”

I don’t have room in this forum to fully develop Duck’s position, much less respond to it. But I do think that she has created a question that should be discussed much more among Christians: Do we develop our understandings of who God is based on our human relationships, or do we develop our human relationships based on how we understand God?

If my ideas of God were based on my earthly father’s relationship with me, then I would be an incredibly confused person! As much as I love my dad, he does not come even close to revealing my understanding of God. If I were to limit my understandings of God to what I have experienced with my dad, then God is not worthy of worship.

Please don’t get me wrong! If I were to draw up a two-column chart listing Dad’s good and bad sides, the good side would be twice as long the bad side. My dad has many admirable qualities: generosity, honesty, integrity, commitment, loyalty, humor, and more. But he still has some negative qualities: short-sightedness, stubbornness, and arrogance, to name a few. And I recognize most of my good and bad qualities are inherited from him. I deal with stubbornness, arrogance, and having s short fuse. I also strive to be honest, generous, and loyal.

Rather than projecting all of my father’s good qualities onto God (and conversely making God subject to Dad’s shortcomings), I recognize that God is the SOURCE of all the good qualities I have experienced from Dad. As for Dad’s negatives, they come from the truth that we are all sinners who fall short of God’s glory (see Romans 3:23).

What kind of gods are imagined when human characteristics are imposed upon them? Think back to your Greek mythology lessons in junior high school. Take Zeus, who would inflict punishments on a whim, who had troubles with lust, who had a jealous wife, and who ultimately was feared rather than loved by his people.

Now consider how God is described in 1 John 4:14-19: “We have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.

“God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us.”

That’s how fathers should try to live, and I thank God that my Dad – despite his faults – has tried to exemplify God’s love to me. I am grateful to report that today, my dad and I enjoy a much stronger relationship. He loves my wife and has accepted her fully into the family, and he’s been the best long-distance grandfather for my kids! Happy Father’s Day, Dad!